A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

A loafer always has the correct time.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

After a fellow gets famous it doesn't take long for someone to bob up that used to sit by him in school.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

An optimist is a fellow who believes what's going to be will be postponed.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Being an optimist after you've got everything you want doesn't count.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Every once in a while someone without a single bad habit gets caught.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

I'll say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that's more than I can say for prosperity.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

It ain't a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you're talking about.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

It's going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth after they inherit it.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

It's going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth once they inherit it.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

It's the good loser who finally loses out.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

It's what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Lack of pep is often mistaken for patience.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Men are not punished for their for sins, but by them.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out any quicker than the Christmas spirit.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone, any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Nobody ever grew despondent looking for trouble.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it's by applause.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Peace has its victories no less than war, but it doesn't have as many monuments to unveil.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Some folks can look so busy doing nothing that they seem indispensable.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

The world gels better every day - then worse again in the evening.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore and too young to kick.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it?
- Kin Hubbard Quote

Universal peace sounds ridiculous to the head of an average family.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

We'd all like to vote for the best man but he's never a candidate.
- Kin Hubbard Quote

When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.
- Kin Hubbard Quote