Falfa: Hey man, I'm sorry if I scared ya!
Milner: You're gonna hafta do one hell of a lot more than that to scare me!
Falfa: Hey I've been lookin' all over for ya man. Didn't nobody tell ya I was lookin' for ya?
Milner: Man, I can't keep track of all you punks runnin' 'round here backwards.
Falfa: Hey you're s'posed to be the fastest thing in the Valley man, but that can't be your car. It must be your mama's car! I'm sorta' embarrassed to be this close to ya!
Milner: Yeah, well I'm not surprised, drivin' a field car!
Falfa: Field car? What's a field car?
Milner: A field car runs through the fields, droppin' cow shit all over the place to make the lettuce grow.
Falfa: Ha ha! That's pretty good! Say, I like the color of your car there. What's that s'posed to be? Sort of a cross between piss yella' and puke green ain't it?
Milner: Well, you call that a paint job, but it's pretty ugly. I bet you got to sneak up on the pumps just to get a little air in your tires!
Falfa: Well at least I don't have to pull over to the side just to let a funeral go by man.
Milner: Oh ho, funny!

Carol: Your car is uglier than I am. Oops, that didn't come out right.

Debbie Dunham: Peel out, I just love it when guys peel out.

Debbie Dunham: It only took me one night to realize if brains were dynamite you couldn't blow your nose.

Mr. Kroot: All right, Bolander, break that up. You know the rules. You and your girlfriend want to do that, go someplace else, huh?
Steve Bolander: Hey, Kroot! Why don't you go kiss a duck?
Mr. Kroot: What did you say?
Steve Bolander: I said, go kiss a duck, marblehead.
Mr. Kroot: OK, Bolander, you are suspended. Don't -- don't even come in on Monday. You're out, you're out!
Steve Bolander: Hey, hey, Kroot. I graduated last semester. Remember?

Peg: Joe College strikes out.

Carol: Hey, is this what they call "copping a feel"?
John Milner: What? No. N-O. Sheezus.
Carol: What's your name, anyway?
John Milner: My name? Mud, if anyone sees you.

Debbie Dunham: Girls don't pay -- guys pay!

Debbie Dunham: I love it when guys peel out!

Ants: Hey, man, who cut the cheese?
Joe: He who smelt it, dealt it.

Joe: OK, you got it? You're on your own. I'm going to wait over there.
Curt Henderson: Now, wait a minute, Joe. What if he hears me?
Joe: Shhh. Listen! Look at it this way. Now, you have three choices. One, you chicken out and in that case I let Ants tie you to the car and drag you around a bit. And you don't want that.
Curt Henderson: No.
Joe: Two, you foul up and Holstein hears you and, well, you don't want that.
Curt Henderson: No, I don't.
Joe: Three, you're successful and you join the Pharaohs with a car coat and a blood initiation.
[Pats Curt on the shoulder and runs back to the car.]
Curt Henderson: Wait a minute. What blood initiation?!

Carol: Oh, rats. I was hoping I might see some friends here.
John Milner: Probably a couple of weeks past their bedtime.
Carol: Oh, wait, there's Dee Dee. I hope she sees me.
John Milner: Oh, shit. Dee Dee!

Bob Falfa: Hey, you know a guy around here with a piss yellow deuce coupe, supposed to be hot stuff?
Terry: You mean John Milner?
[Falfa nods slowly]
Terry: Hey, nobody can beat him, man. He's got the fastest--
Bob Falfa: I ain't nobody, dork. Right?
Terry: Right.
Bob Falfa: Hey, you see this Milner, tell him I'm lookin' for him, huh? Tell him I aim to blow his ass right off the road.

Bob Falfa: Hey, hey, hey, baby. What do you say?
Laurie Henderson: Don't say anything and we'll get along just fine.

Mr. Wolfe: Hey, I thought you'd left already.
Curt Henderson: No, not yet.
Mr. Wolfe: Boy, do I remember when I went off. Got drunk as hell the night before. Just--
Curt Henderson: Blotto.
Mr. Wolfe: Blotto, exactly. Barfed on the train all next day.
Curt Henderson: Cute, very cute. Where'd you go again?
Mr. Wolfe: Middlebury, Vermont.
Curt Henderson: On a scholarship?
Mr. Wolfe: On a scholarship.
Curt Henderson: Stayed only one semester?
Mr. Wolfe: One semester. After all that, I came back here.
Curt Henderson: Why did you come back?
Mr. Wolfe: I don't know. I guess I just wasn't the competitive type.

Curt Henderson: Somebody wants me. Somebody's who's out there, roaming the streets, wants ME... Would you turn the corner?!

Teenager in car: [to Terry] Is that you in that beautiful car? Geez, what a waste of machinery!