Oda Mae Brown: I don't know you! I don't know Sam, but let me tell you what he did to me. He kept me up all night singing "I'm Henry the Eighth I Am."
Molly Jensen: That's how he got me to go out with him.

[Oda Mae just gave a four-million-dollar check to some nuns.]
Sam Wheat: I'm proud of you, Oda Mae!
Oda Mae Brown: You know something, Sam? I don't care if you're proud of me. You just stay away from me from now on. What is that nun going to do with it? She can't even buy underwear.

Sam: Molly, you're in danger.
Oda Mae Brown: You can't just blurt it out like that! And quit moving around, because you're starting to make me dizzy. I'll just tell her in my own way.
[pause; then, to Molly]
Oda Mae Brown: Molly, you in danger girl.

[When handing the check to the nuns]
Sam: Hand her the check.
Oda Mae Brown: I will!

Sam Wheat: Write it down.
Oda Mae Brown: [to Molly Jensen] He wants you to write it down.
Sam Wheat: No, YOU write it down!
Oda Mae Brown: I ain't no DAMN secretary!

Oda Mae Brown: [spiritually possessed by Orlando] Ortisha? Where you at? I can't hardly see!
Ortisha: Orlando? Orlando!
Oda Mae Brown: Damn baby,what'd you do to yo hair?!
Ortisha: Orlando, you like it? It's "autumn sunrise."

[Looking longingly at a pack of cigarettes.]
Subway Lord: Ahh what I wouldn't give for a drag! Just one drag!

Molly Jensen: I love you.
Sam Wheat: Ditto.

Oda Mae Brown: He's stuck, that's what it is. He's in between worlds. You know it happens sometimes that the spirit gets yanked out so fast that the essence still feels it has work to do here.
Sam Wheat: Would you stop rambling?
Oda Mae Brown: I don't think I'm rambling, I'm just answering the question. He's got a' attitude now.
Sam Wheat: I don't have an attitude.
Oda Mae Brown: Yes, you do have an attitude. If you didn't have an attitude, you would not have raised your voice at me now would you?
Sam Wheat: God dammit -
Oda Mae Brown: Don't you "God dammit" me. Don't you take the Lord's name in vain with me. I don't take that!
Sam Wheat: Would you relax?
Oda Mae Brown: No, you relax, you're the dead guy!

Oda Mae Brown: I know you don't think I'm giving this 4 million dollars to a bunch of nuns!!!
Sam: Think of it this way, you'll go to Heaven.
Oda Mae Brown: I don't want to go to Heaven, I want to go to the bank and cash a GODDAMN CHECK!!

Sam: I love you Molly. I always have.
Molly: Ditto.

Sam Wheat: It's amazing, Molly. The love inside, you take it with you.

Oda Mae Brown: Why don't you go haunt a house? Rattle some chains or something.

Sam Wheat: They're going to kill you, Carl. You and Willie! You're going to be fertilizer. They're gonna bury you right next to Jimmy Hoffa.

Molly Jensen: Carl, are you all right?
Carl Bruner: It's just my stomach! Do you have anything like Pepto Bismol or something like that?
Sam Wheat: Cyanide!